The past few weeks I found that I’ve had very little time for myself. Between social commitments, work, and networking I was seriously neglecting my “me” time. Being an only child, “me” time isn’t just a desire, it’s a necessity. Without it I become overwhelmed, anxious, and even resentful. Yes I have to admit, even when I am participating in great opportunities that I worked so hard to create I can become resentful over the time it’s occupying in my life. I begin to fantasize about having an empty calendar with endless amounts of hours to myself.

Now do I really want countless days filled with nothing to do? No not really, but in the state of overwhelm it sure feels like that. I could tell that I reached that point this week when I said to a friend, “I wish I could get sick right now so that I could have an excuse to cancel my plans and stay in bed for a few days.” Apparently I am quite the powerful manifestor, because I woke up the next day sick. And I was kinda happy about it. I know that seems absurd, but I felt like I could now give myself permission to take a break, get more sleep, and say “no, I can’t go out tonight, I’m sick.”

Once the sore throat and headache started in I decided that I didn’t care so much for being sick after all. In fact it would have been a lot easier if I had just said “no” to the commitments that were making me feel overwhelmed. Why did I feel the need to have an excuse such as being sick? Why couldn’t I just say “no, I’ve been working my butt off, I’m tired, and I just want some time to myself.”

I understand that not everyone likes having a lot of alone time, but I relish it. The busier my life becomes the more time out I need to take time for myself. I can think clearer on my own, feel more creative, and can be a lot more productive. I find that it gives my mind a chance to breathe. I come up with more ideas and become more focused when I have that down time. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about becoming a recluse for weeks at a time, just a few hours, or ok maybe a whole Sunday.

Bottom line, “me” time is essential to my well-being. So why do I find it so difficult to prioritize this time in my life?

I can answer that in one word: GUILT!

I feel guilty when I say “no.” When I have to let someone down and disappoint them. I feel guilty for taking time for myself and question whether I am being selfish. And if I do muster up the courage to say “no” or cancel plans I feel like I better have a damn good excuse.

The thing is, when I am in a place of overwhelm and busyness I am no fun to be around. If I am meeting up with friends I will just be anxious and stressed the whole time. And if I am at a networking event I certainly won’t appear inviting and dynamic. My energy will be totally off. Considering I’m an acupuncturist and my job is to work with energy it’s pretty essential that I take care of my own. Which is why I decided to say “no” this past weekend.

I said “no” to a bunch of things, and I spent practically the whole weekend by myself. It was awesome! I felt rested, rejuvenated, and recharged. My mind was clear and focused for the week ahead. My body felt healthy and strong. Not to mention that my house got a much needed deep cleaning and I cooked up a storm!

Having had this time makes me realize even more how important it is for me. I am already going through my calendar for the month and making sure that I set aside that “me” time. And if I find myself in a busy crunch where I am feeling that overwhelm kick in, I may just have to start saying “no” and disappoint some people.

I tell my patients all the time how important it is to set healthy boundaries in their life and take care of their own needs before they try and take care of everyone else. It’s time that I start applying that advise to my own life.

So if you ask me if I am free next Sunday, no I’m not. I don’t need an excuse, I don’t need to justify, “no” is a complete sentence.

Are you getting in enough “me” time? Are you afraid to let people down if you prioritize your own needs? This week try saying “no” to something that you really don’t want to do, and free up that space for yourself.